Chapter XXXII: Act V: (Half an hour has elapsed.)

ENTER _Hegio_, _Philopolemus_, _Philocrates_, AND
_Stalagmus._

_Hegio_

Iovi disque ago gratias merito magnas,
quom reducem tuo te patri reddiderunt
quomque ex miseriis plurimis me exemerunt,
quae adhuc te carens dum hic[25] fui sustentabam,
quomque hunc conspicor in potestate nostra,
quomque huius reperta est fides firma nobis.

(_to Philopolemus_) I thank God with all my heart, as
I ought, for bringing you back to your father, and for
relieving me of the dreadful anguish I’ve been enduring as
day after day went by, and I still here without you; yes,
and for letting me see this rascal (_indicating Stalagmus_)
in my power, and for this gentleman’s (_indicating
Philocrates_) proving himself a man of honour in standing
by his promise to us.

_Philop._

Satis iam dolui ex animo, et cura me satis et lacrumis maceravi,
satis iam audivi tuas aerumnas, ad portum mihi quas memorasti.
hoc agamus.

(_seeing Philocrates is getting impatient_) I’ve had quite
enough bitter suffering, and enough of wearing myself out
with anxiety and weeping, too, and I’ve heard quite enough
of your distress of which you told me at the harbour,
father! So now to the main point. (_turns to Philocrates_)

_Philocr._

Quid nunc, quoniam tecum servavi fidem 930
tibique hunc reducem in libertatem feci?

(_to Hegio_) What of me, sir, now that I have kept faith
with you and secured the liberty of your son here?

_Hegio_

Fecisti ut tibi,
Philocrates, numquam referre gratiam possim satis,
proinde ut tu promeritu’s de me et filio.

After the way you have acted, Philocrates, I’m entirely
unable to show gratitude enough for your treatment of me and
my son.

_Philop._

Immo potes,
pater, et poteris et ego potero, et di eam potestatem dabunt
ut beneficium bene merenti nostro merito muneres;
sicut tu huic[26] potes, pater mi, facere merito maxume.

No, no, you are able, father, yes, and always will be able,
and so shall I be, and Heaven will give you the ability to
do a deserved kindness to a man that has been so kind to us.
It’s just as with this slave here, (_pointing to Stalagmus_)
father dear; you’re able to give him his full deserts.

_Hegio_

Quid opust verbis? lingua nullast qua negem quidquid roges.

(_to Philocrates_) It’s plain enough, sir,--I have no tongue
with which to refuse a request of yours.

_Philocr._

Postulo abs te, ut mi illum reddas servom, quem hic reliqueram
pignus pro me, qui mihi melior quam sibi semper fuit,
pro bene factis eius ut ei pretium possim reddere. 940

What I ask you to do is to give me back the slave I
left here as security for myself--he was always ready to
sacrifice himself for me!--so that I can reward him for his
kindnesses.

_Hegio_

Quod bene fecisti referetur gratia id quod postulas;
et id et aliud, quod me orabis, impetrabis. atque te
nolim suscensere quod ego iratus ei feci male.

You have been kind to us, sir, and I shall be glad to do as
you ask; both that request, and any other, will be granted.
(_embarrassed_) And--and I trust you won’t be incensed at me
for getting angry and treating him badly.

_Philocr._

Quid fecisti?

(_anxiously_) What did you do?

_Hegio_

In lapicidinas compeditum condidi,
ubi rescivi mihi data esse verba.

I had him fettered and put down in the stone quarries when I
found out I had been imposed upon.

_Philocr._

Vae misero mihi,
propter meum caput labores homini evenisse optumo.

God forgive me! To think of the splendid fellow suffering
so, and all for my sake!

_Hegio_

At ob eam rem mihi libellam pro eo argenti ne duis.
gratiis a me, ut sit liber, ducito.

Well, sir, this being so, you needn’t give me a single
farthing for him: take him from me gratis--he is a free man.

_Philocr._

Edepol, Hegio.
facis benigne. sed quaeso, hominem ut iubeas arcessi.

Well, well, Hegio, many thanks! But have him sent for, I beg
you.

_Hegio_

Licet.
ubi estis vos? ite actutum Tyndarum huc arcessite, 950
vos ite intro. interibi ego ex hac statua verberea volo
erogitare, meo minore quid sit factum filio.
vos lavate interibi.

By all means (_calling to slaves in house_) Where are you?
[ENTER OVERSEERS] Quick! go bring Tyndarus here. [EXEUNT
OVERSEERS] (_to Philopolemus and Philocrates_) As for you
lads, step inside. Meanwhile I want to inquire of this
whipping post here (_pointing to Stalagmus_) what was done
with my younger son. You can take a bath meanwhile.

_Philop._

Sequere hac. Philocrates, me intro.

Come along in with me, Philocrates.

_Philocr._

Sequor.

Certainly. [EXEUNT.

V. 2.

Scene 2.

_Hegio_

Age tu illuc procede. bone vir, lepidum mancupium meum.

(_to Stalagmus_) Come now, you! Over there with you,
(_pointing_) my good sir, my charming piece of property.

_Stal._

Quid me oportet facere, ubi tu talis vir falsum autumas?
fui ego bellus, lepidus. bonus vir numquam, neque frugi bonae,
neque ero umquam, ne erres: spem ponas me bonae frugi fore.

(_sullenly_) What can you look for from me, when a fine
gentleman like you tells lies? I’ve had my day as a dandy, a
charmer; a good sir, or good for anything, I never was, and
I never will be, make no mistake, don’t you build up hopes I
will be good for anything.

_Hegio_

Propemodum ubi loci fortunae tuae sint facile intellegis.
si eris verax, tua ex re, facies ex mala meliusculam.
recte et vera loquere, sed neque vere neque tu recte adhuc 960
fecisti umquam.

You have no difficulty in appreciating your position pretty
fairly well. Now be truthful, and you’ll be acting to your
own advantage and make a bad prospect somewhat better. Out
with your story, make it straightforward and honest--virtues
you have never displayed hitherto, however.

_Stal._

Quod ego fatear, credin pudeat cum autumes?

When I’m ready to admit a thing myself d’ye think I should
be ashamed of it just because you say it’s so?

_Hegio_

At ego faciam ut pudeat, nam in ruborem te totum dabo.

I’ll make you ashamed, though: (_savagely_) I tell you what,
I’ll make one big blush of you.

_Stal._

Eia, credo ego imperito plagas minitaris mihi.
tandem ista aufer ac dic quid fers, ut feras hinc quod petis.

(_ironically_) La! La! I’m promised a whipping, it seems,
and I such a novice at it--oh, yes I am! Look here, get done
with that talk and say what you’ve got to propose, so as to
get what you’re after.

_Hegio_

Satis facundu’s. sed iam fieri dicta compendi volo.

Quite a gift of tongue, sir! But oblige me by saving some of
it for the moment.

_Stal._

Ut vis fiat.

Anything you like.

_Hegio_

Bene morigerus fuit puer, nunc non decet.
hoc agamus. iam animum advorte ac mihi quae dicam edissere.[27] (967)

(_half aside_) That compliance he showed as a boy hardly
becomes him at present. (_aloud_) To business! Now then,
pay attention and answer me fully.

_Stal._

Nugae istaec sunt. non me censes scire quid dignus siem? (969)

Rot! Don’t you suppose I know what I deserve?

_Hegio_

At ea subterfugere potis es pauca, si non omnia. 970

Well, you have a chance to escape a little of it, if not all.

_Stal._

Pauca effugiam, scio; nam multa evenient, et merito meo,
quia et fugi et tibi surripui filium et eum vendidi.

Little enough I’ll escape, I know that; for there’ll be
plenty coming, and it serves me right, seeing I ran away
and kidnapped your son and sold him.

_Hegio_

Cui homini?

To whom?

_Stal._

Theodoromedi in Alide Polyplusio,
sex minis.

(_drawling_) Theodoromedes Goldfields, in Elis, for
twenty-four pounds.

_Hegio_

Pro di immortales, is quidem huius est pater Philocrati.

God bless my soul! Why, he is the father of Philocrates
here!

_Stal._

Quin melius novi quam tu et vidi saepius.

Well, I know him better than you, and I’ve seen him oftener.

_Hegio_

Serva, Iuppiter supreme, et me et meum gnatum mihi.
Philocrates, per tuom te genium obsecro, exi, te volo.

God Almighty, save me and save my boy for me! (_running to
door and shouting_) Philocrates! Here, here, come, on your
life! I want you!

V. 3.

Scene 3.

ENTER _Philocrates_.

_Philocr_

Hegio, assum. si quid me vis, impera.

Here I am, Hegio. If I can be of any service, command me.

_Hegio_

Hic gnatum meum
tuo patri ait se vendidisse sex minis in Alide.

(_beside himself_) This fellow says my son--he sold him to
your father--for twenty-four pounds--in Elis!

_Philocr._

Quam diu id factum est?

How long ago was this?

_Stal._

His annus incipit vicensimus. 980

Going on for twenty years.

_Philocr._

Falsa memorat.

He’s lying.

_Stal._

Aut ego aut tu. nam tibi quadrimulum
tuos pater peculiarem parvolo puero dedit.

(_indifferent_) One of us is. As a matter of fact, your
father gave you a little four year old boy for your own,
when you were nothing but a youngster yourself.

_Philocr._

Quid erat ei nomen? si vera dicis, memoradum mihi.

(interested) What was his name? If your story is true, come,
tell me that.

_Stal._

Paegnium vocitatust, post vos indidistis Tyndaro.

Styled Pettie, he was: later on you folks called him
Tyndarus.

_Philocr._

Cur ego te non novi?

How is it I don’t know you?

_Stal._

Quia mos est oblivisci hominibus
neque novisse cuius nihili sit faciunda gratia.

Because it’s the regular thing to forget a fellow and cut
him, in case his good will can’t help you at all.

_Philocr._

Dic mihi, isne istic fuit, quem vendidisti meo patri,
qui mihi peculiaris datus est?

Tell me, was that boy you sold my father the same one that
was given me for my own?

_Stal._

Huius filius.

(_with a nod in Hegio’s direction_) His son.

_Hegio_

Vivitne is homo?

(_eagerly_) Is he alive, this--man?

_Stal._

Argentum accepi, nil curavi ceterum.

I got the money: that’s all I bothered about.

_Hegio_

Quid tu ais?

(_to Philocrates_) What do you say?

_Philocr._

Quin istic ipsust Tyndarus tuos filius, 990
ut quidem hic argumenta loquitur. nam is mecum a puero puer
bene pudiceque educatust usque ad adulescentiam.

Why, it’s Tyndarus himself that is your son, at least
according to this fellow’s evidence. For Tyndarus has been
brought up with me from the time we were boys, and brought
up in good honest fashion.

_Hegio_

Et miser sum et fortunatus, si vos vera dicitis;
eo miser sum quia male illi feci, si gnatust meus.
eheu, quom ego plus minusve feci quam me aequom fuit.
quod male feci crucior; modo si infectum fieri possiet.
sed eccum incedit huc ornatus haud ex suis virtutibus.

I feel miserable and happy both, if what you two say is
true! Miserable at having been so hard on him, if he is my
own boy! Dear, dear! how much more I’ve done than I ought,
or how much less! It’s torment, to think of the horrible
thing I’ve done--oh, if it could only be undone! (_looking
down street_) Look, though,--there he comes! To be decked
out like that, the noble fellow!

V. 4.

Scene 4.

ENTER _Tyndarus_ ESCORTED BY OVERSEERS. HE IS HEAVILY IRONED
AND CARRIES A CROWBAR.

_Tynd._

Vidi ego multa saepe picta, quae Acherunti fierent
cruciamenta, verum enim vero nulla adaeque est Acheruns
atque ubi ego fui, in lapicidinis. illic ibi demumst locus, 1000
ubi labore lassitudo est exigunda ex corpore.

(_dryly_) I have seen a good many pictures whose subject was
torture in Hell: but upon my soul, there is no hell that can
match those stone quarries where I’ve been. That place down
there is certainly the one where a weary man can be dead
sure of working off his tired feeling.

nam ubi illo adveni, quasi patricus pueris aut monerulae,
aut anites aut coturnices dantur, quicum lusitent
itidem mi haec advenienti upupa, qui me delectem, datast
sed erus eccum ante ostium, et erus alter eccum ex Alide
rediit.

Why, when I got there it was just like your young scions
of the nobility being given daws or ducks or quails for
playfellows: my own case exactly--the moment I arrived they
gave me this crow to have a lark with. (_looking toward
Hegio’s house_) But there’s my master in front of the door--
and, yes, my other master back from Elis!

_Hegio_

Salve, exoptate gnate mi.

Oh, how are you, my own longed-for son?

_Tynd._

Hem, quid gnate mi?
attat. scio cur te patrem adsimules esse et me filium:
quia mi item ut parentes lucis das tuendi copiam.

Eh? “My son?” How’s that? (_pauses, then with a weary
laugh_) Ah, yes, yes, I see the point of your father and
son chaff: just as parents do, you give me a chance to
behold the light of day.

_Philocr._

Salve, Tyndare.

God bless you, Tyndarus!

_Tynd._

Et tu, quoius causa hanc aerumnam exigo.

And you, sir, for whose sake I’m undergoing this confounded
experience.

_Philocr._

At nunc liber in divitias faxo venies. nam tibi 1010
pater hic est; hic servos, qui te huic hinc quadrimum surpuit.
vendidit patri meo te sex minis, is te mihi
parvolum peculiarem parvolo puero dedit:
illic indicium fecit; nam hunc ex Alide huc reduximus.

But now you shall be a free man, Tyndarus, and a rich one,
I promise you. For here is (_indicating Hegio_) your father;
this slave (_indicating Stalagmus_) stole you away from him
here when you were four years old and sold you to my father
for twenty-four pounds. And when we were both small boys,
father gave you to me for my own. That fellow there has
proved it all; you see we brought him back here from Elis.

_Tynd._

Quid huius filium?

(_dazed_) What about his son?

_Philocr._

Intus eccum fratrem germanum tuom.[28] (1015)

Look--inside there--your own brother!

_Tynd._

Nunc edepol demum in memoriam regredior, audisse me (1023)
quasi per nebulam, Hegionem meum patrem vocarier.

Great heavens! When I think back I do now at last remember
hearing--in a cloudy sort of way--my father called Hegio!

_Hegio_

Is ego sum.

(_embracing him_) I am that Hegio!

_Philocr._

Compedibus quaeso ut tibi sit levior filius
atque huic gravior servos.

(_to Hegio, pointing to the shackles on Tyndarus_). Those
irons, sir,--for mercy’s sake get yourself a lighter son,
and him a heavier slave. (_indicating Stalagmus_)

_Hegio_

Certum est principio id praevortier.
eamus intro, ut arcessatur faber, ut istas compedes
tibi adimam, huic dem.

Yes, yes, I must see to that first of all. Let’s go inside
and have a blacksmith sent for, so that I may get those
irons off of you and make this fellow (_turning to
Stalagmus_) a present of them.

_Stal._

Quoi peculi nihil est, recte feceris.

Thanks awfully--seeing I haven’t a thing I can call my own.
[EXEUNT OMNES.

CATERVA