Chapter XXII: Act II: ENTER Chrysalus

_Chrys._

Erilis patria, salve, quam ego biennio, 170
postquam hinc in Ephesum abii conspicio lubens.
saluto te, vicine Apollo, qui aedibus
propinquos nostris accolis, veneroque te,
ne Nicobulum me sinas nostrum senem
prius convenire quam sodalem viderim
Mnesilochi Pistoclerum, quem ad epistulam
Mnesilochus misit super amica Bacchide.

(_jauntily_) Greetings, land of my--master! Land that I
behold with joy after departing hence to Ephesus two years
agone! (_turning toward altar of Apollo in front of house_)
Thee I greet, neighbour Apollo, who dost dwell adjacent to
our house, and I do implore thee not to let our old man
Nicobulus fall in with me ere I see Pistoclerus, the chum
of Mnesilochus, to whom Mnesilochus hath sent a letter about
his mistress, Bacchis.

II. 2.

Scene 2.

ENTER _Pistoclerus_ FROM HOUSE OF _Bacchis._

_Pistoc._

Mirumst me ut redeam te opere tanto quaesere,
qui abire hinc nullo pacto possim, si velim
ita me vadatum amore vinctumque adtines. 180

(_to Bacchis within_) It seems curious, your begging me
so hard to come back, when I couldn’t possibly leave you if
I wanted, when you’ve got me so bound over to you, held fast
in the fetters of love.

_Chrys._

Pro di immortales, Pistoclerum conspicor.
o Pistoclere, salve.

Ye everlasting gods! It’s Pistoclerus. What ho, sir! How are
you?

_Pistoc._

Salve, Chrysale.

And yourself, Chrysalus?

_Chrys._

Compendi verba multa iam faciam tibi
venire tu me gaudes: ego credo tibi,
hospitium et cenam pollicere, ut convenit
peregre advenienti: ego autem venturum adnuc
salutem tibi ab sodali solidam nuntio
rogabis me ubi sit: vivit.

Here’s for saving you the trouble of a long speech, sir.
You’re glad I’ve come: I believe you. You promise to do the
honours and dine me, the stranger from afar, and so you
should: for my part, I accept. I bring you cordial greetings
from your chum. You’ll ask me where he is: alive.

_Pistoc._

Nempe recte valet?

(_eagerly_) And well, well, of course?

_Chrys._

Istuc volebam ego ex te percontarier.

That’s what I wanted to ask you.

_Pistoc._

Qui scire possum?

How can I know?

_Chrys._

Nullus plus.

None better.

_Pistoc._

Quemnam ad modum? 190

Why, how so?

_Chrys._

Quia si illa inventa est, quam ille amat, recte valet,
si non inventa est, minus valet moribundusque est
animast amica amanti. si abest, nullus est;
si adest, res nullast. ipsus est--nequam et miser,
sed tu quid factitasti mandatis super?

Because if his ladylove has been discovered, he’s perfectly
well: if she’s not discovered, he’s not so well; he’s at
death’s door. His love is life to a lover: if she’s away,
he’s lost; if she’s there, his cash is lost, he himself
being--a poor good-for-nothing fool. But you--what have you
been doing about his commission?

_Pistoc._

Egon ut, quod ab illoc attigisset nuntius,
non impetratum id advenienti ei redderem?
regiones colere mavellem Acherunticas.

I? Am I the man to let him arrive and find the request his
messenger mentioned unattended to? I’d sooner pass my days
in the lower regions.

_Chrys._

Eho, an invenisti Bacchidem?

Hullo! You haven’t found Bacchis?

_Pistoc._

Samiam quidem. 199,200

Yes, the Samian one.

_Chrys._

Vide quaeso, ne quis tractet illam indiligens;
scis tu ut confringi vas cito Samium solet.

(_affecting terror_) Heavens! do see that no one handles
that one carelessly; you know that Samian[D] ware, how
precious brittle it is.

[Footnote D: A fragile and (_The Captives_ 291) cheap kind
of pottery.]

_Pistoc._

Iamne ut soles?

The same old wag, eh?

_Chrys._

Dic ubi ea nunc est, obsecro.

Tell me where she is now, for heaven’s sake.

_Pistoc._

Hic, exeuntem me unde aspexisti modo.

Here in the house you just saw me coming out of.

_Chrys._

Ut istuc est lepidum: proximae viciniae
habitat, ecquidnam meminit Mnesilochi?

Here’s a go! Residing in the immediate neighbourhood! Well,
well! does she remember Mnesilochus?

_Pistoc._

Rogas?
immo unice unum plurimi pendit.

Remember him? More than that, she thinks he’s the one and
only man on earth.

_Chrys._

Papae.

Oh pshaw!

_Pistoc._

Immo ut eam credis? misera amans desiderat.

More than that, what do you suppose her feelings are? The
poor affectionate thing is dying for him.

_Chrys._

Scitum istuc.

Quite charming!

_Pistoc._

Immo, Chrysale, em, non tantulum
umquam intermittit tempus quin eum nominet. 210

More than that, Chrysalus--look!--she doesn’t let even so
much (_illustrating_) time pass without mentioning his name.

_Chrys._

Tanto hercle melior.

Humph! So much the better of her.

_Pistoc._

Immo--

More than that--

_Chrys._

Immo hercle abiero
potius.

(_bored_) More than that, by gad, I’d rather get out of
range!

_Pistoc._

Num invitus rem bene gestam audis eri?

You don’t object to hearing that your master is in a
prosperous situation, do you?

_Chrys._

Non res, sed actor mihi cor odio sauciat.
etiam Epidicum, quam ego fabulam aeque ac me ipsum amo,
nullam aeque invitus specto, si agit Pellio.
sed Bacchis etiam fortis tibi visast?

It’s not the situations that make me sick unto death; it’s
your confounding acting. Even the _Epidicus_[E]--a comedy
I love as well as my own self--well, there’s not a one I so
object to seeing, if Pellio’s playing in it. But you really
consider Bacchis a fine lively one, do you?

[Footnote E: One of Plautus’s plays.]

_Pistoc._

Rogas?
ni nanctus Venerem essem, hanc Iunonem dicerem.

Do you ask me that? If[F] I hadn’t lighted on Venus myself,
I’d call her Juno.

[Footnote F: Venus and Juno not being sisters.]

_Chrys._

Edepol, Mnesiloche, ut hanc rem natam intellego,
quod ames paratumst: quod des inventost opus.
nam istic fortasse auro est opus.

(_half aside_) Well, by gad, Mnesilochus, as far as I can
understand the present situation, you’ve got your love: the
wherewithal is what you need to find. (_to Pistoclerus_)
For I dare say there is need of gold in the affair.

_Pistoc._

Philippeo quidem. 220

Yes, and good coin of the realm.

_Chrys._

Atque eo fortasse iam opust.

And furthermore, I dare say it’s needed soon.

_Pistoc._

Immo etiam prius:
nam iam huc adveniet miles.

No, before that, even: for a Captain’s due here soon.

_Chrys._

Et miles quidem?

Indeed? A Captain, too?

_Pistoc._

Qui de amittenda Bacchide aurum hic exiget.

Who’ll be after money for letting Bacchis go.

_Chrys._

Veniat quando volt, atque ita ne mihi sit morae.
domist: non metuo nec ego quoiquam supplico,
dum quidem hoc valebit pectus perfidia meum.
abi intro, ego hic curabo. tu intus dicito
Mnesilochum adesse Bacchidi.

(_airily_) Let him come when he wants, yes, and let him
take care not to keep me waiting. I’m provided: I fear no
man and supplicate no man, not I,--at least as long as this
heart of mine can prompt a good stiff lie. Inside with you:
(_grandly waving Pistoclerus in_) I’ll take charge here
myself. You tell Bacchis in there that she may expect
Mnesilochus at once.

_Pistoc._

Faciam ut iubes.

Very well. [EXIT.

_Chrys._

Negotium hoc ad me adtinet aurarium.
mille et ducentos Philippum attulimus aureos 230
Epheso, quos hospes debuit nostro seni.
inde ego hodie aliquam machinabor machinam,
unde aurum efficiam amanti erili filio.
sed foris concrepuit nostra: quinam exit foras?

It’s my look out, this business of the exchequer. We’ve
brought twelve hundred sovereigns from Ephesus, money a
friend there owed our old man. I’ll machinate some
machinations to-day for transferring part of said gold to my
lovesick young master. (_listening_) But there goes our
door! Wonder who’s coming out. (_steps aside_)

II. 3.

Scene 3.

ENTER _Nicobulus_ FROM HIS HOUSE.

_Nic._

Ibo in Piraeum, visam ecquae advenerit
in portum ex Epheso navis mercatoria.
nam meus formidat animus, nostrum tam diu
ibi desidere neque redire filium.

I’ll walk down to the Piraeus and see if any merchantman
has come in from Ephesus. It worries me to have my son
dilly-dallying there so long and not returning.

_Chrys._

Extexam ego illum pulchre iam, si di volunt.
haud dormitandumst: opus est chryso Chrysalo. 240
adibo hunc, quem quidem ego hodie faciam hic arietem
Phrixi, itaque tondebo auro usque ad vivam cutem.
servos salutat Nicobulum Chrysalus.

(_aside_) I’ll unravel him handsomely now, God willing. No
sleepyheadedness allowed: Chrysalus, you must be a golden
chrysalis! Here’s at him--the man I’ll certainly make a
[G]Phrixus’s ram here to-day, and by the same token shear off
his gold right down to the quick! (_aloud, ceremoniously_)
Greetings,to Nicobulus from servant Chrysalus, sir.

[Footnote G: The owner of the ram with the golden fleece.]

_Nic._

Pro di immortales, Chrysale, ubi mist filius?

Chrysalus! for the love of heaven where is my son?

_Chrys._

Quin tu salutem primum reddis quam dedi?

(_affecting pique_) Why don’t you return my greeting first,
sir?

_Nic._

Salve. sed ubinamst Mnesilochus?

How d’ye do. (_more animatedly_) But where on earth is
Mnesilochus?

_Chrys._

Vivit, valet.

Alive and well.

_Nic._

Venitne?

Has he come?

_Chrys._

Venit.

He has.

_Nic._

Euax, aspersisti aquam.
benene usque valuit?

(_fervently_ Oh, good, good! That news is like a dash of
water! Has he been well all this time?

_Chrys._

Pancratice atque athletice.

In fighting trim, a perfect athlete.

_Nic._

Quid hoc? qua causa eum in Ephesum miseram,
accepitne aurum ab hospite Archidemide? 250

How about it? The business I sent him to Ephesus for? Did he
get the gold from my friend Archidemides?

_Chrys._

Heu, cor meum et cerebrum, Nicobule, finditur,
istius hominis ubi fit quomque mentio.
tun hospitem illum nominas hostem tuom?

(_disgustedly_) Ugh! My heart and head fairly split, sir,
whenever I hear that fellow mentioned. Call that friend of
yours fiend, won’t you?

_Nic._

Quid ita, obsecro hercle?

Bless my soul! Why, for heaven’s sake?

_Chrys._

Quia edepol certo scio,
Volcanus, Luna, Sol, Dies, dei quattuor,
scelestiorem nullum inluxere alterum.

Good Lord! Because I’m positive the four gods, Fire, Moon,
Sun, and Day, never shone on a more abandoned villain.

_Nic._

Quamne Archidemidem?

Than Archidemides?

_Chrys._

Quam, inquam, Archidemidem.

Yes, than Archidemides.

_Nic._

Quid fecit?

What has he done?

_Chrys._

Quid non fecit? quin tu id me rogas?
primumdum infitias ire coepit filio,
negare se debere tibi triobolum. 260
continuo antiquom hospitem nostrum sibi
Mnesilochus advocavit, Pelagonem senem;
eo praesente homini extemplo ostendit symbolum.
quem tute dederas, ad eum ut ferret, filio.

What hasn’t he done? Why don’t you ask me that? Well, in the
first place he began lying to your son and disclaimed owing
you a single sixpence. Immediately Mnesilochus summoned that
old gentleman, Pelagon, that’s been our friend so long; in
his presence he promptly shows the fellow the token, the one
you gave your son yourself to carry to him.

_Nic._

Quid ubi ei ostendit symbolum?

(_anxiously_) And what when he showed him the token?

_Chrys._

Infit dicere
adulterinum et non eum esse symbolum.
quotque innocenti ei dixit contumelias!
adulterare eum aibat rebus ceteris.

(_indignantly_) He cries out it’s a counterfeit and not
the right token at all. And how he did heap insults on your
innocent boy! Said he was an old hand at counterfeiting.

_Nic._

Habetin aurum? id mihi dici volo.

Have you got the money? Do tell me that.

_Chrys._

Postquam quidem praetor recuperatores dedit. 270
damnatus demum, vi coactus reddidit
ducentos et mille Philippum.

To be sure, after the judge had appointed arbitrators, he
was finally convicted, and, under compulsion, he handed over
twelve hundred pounds.

_Nic._

Tantum debuit.

(_with a sigh of relief_) That was all he owed.

_Chrys._

Porro etiam ausculta pugnam quam voluit dare.

There’s more still, sir,--listen how he wanted to knock us
out.

_Nic._

Etiamnest quid porro?

More still?

_Chrys._

Em, accipitrina haec nunc erit.

Now then! (_aside_) This’ll be a regular hawk swoop.

_Nic._

Deceptus sum. Autolyco hospiti aurum credidi.

(_hotly_) I’ve been deceived! I’ve trusted my gold to an
Autolycus[H] of a friend!

[Footnote H: A noted thief, the grandfather of Ulysses.]

_Chrys._

Quin tu audi.

Come, come, listen.

_Nic._

Immo ingenium avidi haud pernoram hospitis.

Ah, no, I didn’t fathom his greedy soul.

_Chrys._

Postquam aurum abstulimus, in navem conscendimus,
domi cupientes. forte ut adsedi in stega,
dum circumspecto, atque ego lembum conspicor
longum. strigorem maleficum exornarier. 280

After we got the gold we embarked, eager for home. I was
sitting on deck, and while I was looking around, my eye just
happened to fall on a long, staunch, wicked-looking galley
being fitted out for sea.

_Nic._

Perii hercle, lembus ille mihi laedit latus.

Hell and fury! That galley is ramming me amidships!

_Chrys._

Is erat communis cum hospite et praedonibus.

(_with emphasis_) It was owned between your friend and some
pirates.

_Nic._

Adeon me fuisse fungum, ut qui illi crederem,
cum mi ipsum nomen eius Archidemides
clamaret dempturum esse, si quid crederem?

(_agonized_) Could I have been such an imbecile as to trust
the fellow when his very name, Archidemides, fairly bawled
out that I’d be damned easy, if I did trust him with
anything?

_Chrys._

Is lembus nostrae navi insidias dabat.
occepi ego observare eos quam rem gerant.
interea e portu nostra navis solvitur.
ubi portu eximus, homines remigio sequi,
neque aves neque venti citius. quoniam sentio 290
quae res gereretur, navem extemplo statuimus.
quoniam vident nos stare, occeperunt ratem
tardare[10] in portu.

(_warming up_) This galley was lying in wait for our ship.
I began to keep an eye on their operations aboard her.
Meanwhile our ship weighs anchor and moves out of the
harbour. When we get outside they row after us fast as a
bird, fast as the wind. Now that I noticed what was up,
we brought to at once. Now that they saw us lying to they
began to slow down there in the harbour.

_Nic._

Edepol mortalis malos.
quid denique agitis?

God bless me, what rascals! What did you do then?

_Chrys._

Rursum in portum recipimus.

We put back to the harbour.

_Nic._

Sapienter factum a vobis. quid illi postea?

That was wise. What did they do after that?

_Chrys._

Revorsionem ad terram faciunt vesperi.

Toward evening they went ashore.

_Nic._

Aurum hercle auferre voluere: ei rei operam dabant.

By the Lord! They wanted to make off with the gold: that was
their aim!

_Chrys._

Non me fefellit, sensi, eo exanimatus fui.
quoniam videmus auro insidias fieri,
capimus consilium continuo; postridie 300
auferimus aurum omne illis praesentibus
palam atque aperte, ut illi id factum sciscerent.

I knew that well enough: I saw through it. That drove me
frantic. Now that we perceived that they had designs on the
gold, we laid our plans at once; the next day we carried it
all ashore publicly and openly while they were by, to let
them know it was done.

_Nic._

Scite hercle. cedo quid illi?

By Jove, a neat idea! Come, come, what did they do?

_Chrys._

Tristes ilico,
quom extemplo a portu ire nos cum auro vident,
subducunt lembum capitibus quassantibus.
nos apud Theotimum omne aurum deposivimus,
qui illic sacerdos est Dianae Ephesiae.

Looked doleful on the spot, and as soon as they see us go
away from the harbour with the gold there’s a shaking of
heads and they beach their galley. As for us, we deposited
all the gold with Theotimus, the priest of Diana there at
Ephesus.

_Nic._

Quis istic Theotimust?

(_suspiciously_) Who is that Theotimus?

_Chrys._

Megalobuli filius,
qui nunc in Ephesost Ephesiis carissimus.

(_reassuringly_) Megalobulus’s son, sir, and quite the
dearest man in all Ephesus to the Ephesians.

_Nic._

Ne ille hercle mihi sit multo tanto carior, 310
si me illo auro tanto circumduxerit.

Good Lord! He certainly would be a very, very much dearer
man to me, if he should swindle me out of so much gold.

_Chrys._

Quin in eapse aede Dianai conditumst.
ibidem publicitus servant.

Oh, but it’s stored in the temple of Diana itself. It’s in
public keeping there.

_Nic._

Occidistis me;
nimio hic privatim servaretur rectius.
sed nilne attulistis inde auri domum?

Yes, worse luck! It would be a great deal safer in private
keeping here. But you didn’t bring any of it home, not any?

_Chrys._

Immo etiam. verum quantum attulerit nescio.

To be sure, we did. Just how much we brought, though,
I don’t know.

_Nic._

Quid? nescis?

What? Don’t know?

_Chrys._

Quia Mnesilochus noctu clanculum
devenit ad Theotimum, nec mihi credere
nec cuiquam in navi voluit: eo ego nescio
quantillum attulerit; verum haud permultum attulit. 320

You see Mnesilochus visited Theotimus on the sly, by night,
and he didn’t care to confide in me or anyone else aboard:
so I don’t know just what trifle he did bring along; not
very much, though.

_Nic._

Etiam dimidium censes?

As much as half, do you think?

_Chrys._

Non edepol scio;
verum haud opinor.

Upon my soul, I don’t know; but I don’t believe so.

_Nic._

Fertne partem tertiam?

A third, eh?

_Chrys._

Non hercle opinor; verum verum nescio.
profecto de auro nil scio nisi nescio.
nunc tibimet illuc navi capiundumst iter,
ut illud reportes aurum ab Theotimo domum.
atque heus tu.

Bless my soul, I don t believe so; however, I don’t know. In
fact, all I know about the money is that I don’t know. Now
you’ll have to make a voyage there yourself, sir, so as to
get it from Theotimus and bring it back home. And, oh, I say!

_Nic._

Quid vis?

Well?

_Chrys._

Anulum gnati tui
facito ut memineris ferre.

See you remember to take your son’s ring along.

_Nic._

Quid opust anulo?

Ring? What for?

_Chrys._

Quia id signumst cum Theotimo, qui eum illi adferet,
ei aurum ut reddat.

Because we arranged with Theotimus that he’s to give the
gold to the man that brings him that ring.

_Nic._

Meminero, et recte mones. 330
sed divesne est istic Theotimus?

I shall remember; well you mentioned it, too. But is that
Theotimus wealthy?

_Chrys._

Etiam rogas?
quin auro habeat soccis subpactum solum?

Wealthy, eh? Wealthy? And he with gold soles on his shoes!

_Nic._

Cur ita fastidit?

What makes him so high and mighty?

_Chrys._

Tantas divitias habet;
nescit quid faciat auro.

He’s so rich; he doesn’t know what to do with gold.

_Nic._

Mihi dederit velim.
sed qui praesente id aurum Theotimo datumst?

(_sighing_) Wish he’d give it to me! But who was there when
this money was given to Theotimus?

_Chrys._

Populo praesente: nullust Ephesi quin sciat.

The whole population, sir: there’s not a soul in Ephesus but
knows about it.

_Nic._

Istuc sapienter saltem fecit filius,
cum diviti homini id aurum servandum dedit;
ab eo licebit quamvis subito sumere.

My son showed sense in that, at any rate,--giving it to a
wealthy man to keep for him. You can get it from such a man
at a moment’s notice.

_Chrys._

Immo em tantisper numquam te morabitur 340
quin habeas illud quo die illuc veneris.

Oh no, he’ll never keep you waiting, not--see here--
(_illustrating_) not so long: he’ll let you have it the
day you arrive.

_Nic._

Censebam me effugisse a vita marituma,
ne navigarem tandem hoc aetatis senex;
id mi haud, utrum velim, licere intellego:
ita bellus hospes fecit Archidemides.
ubi nunc est ergo meus Mnesilochus filius?

I thought I had escaped from the seafaring life, that an old
man of my age might really be done with voyaging. But no
choice is left me, I perceive, in this case--thanks to the
tactics of my charming friend Archidemides. Where is my son
Mnesilochus at present, then?

_Chrys._

Deos atque amicos iit salutatum ad forum.

Gone to the forum to pay his respects to the gods and his
friends.

_Nic._

At ego hinc eo ad illum, ut convenam quantum
potest.

Well, I shall go and try to find him as soon as possible.
[EXIT TO FORUM.

_Chrys._

Ille est oneratus recte et plus iusto vehit.
exorsa haec tela non male omnino mihi est: 350
ut amantem erilem copem facerem filium,
ita feci, ut auri quantum vellet sumeret,
quantum autem lubeat reddere ut reddat patri.

(_gleefully_) He’s nicely freighted, he is, in fact,
overfreighted. Not a half bad sort of web I’ve woven here!
To set up the young master in funds for his love affair,
I’ve fixed things so that he can take as much of the gold as
he wants himself, yes, and pass on to his father as much as
he likes to pass on.

senex in Ephesum ibit aurum arcessere,
hic nostra agetur aetas in malacum modum,
siquidem hic relinquet neque secum abducet senex
med et Mnesilochum. quas ego hic turbas dabo!
sed quid futurumst, cum hoc senex resciverit,
cum se excucurisse illuc frustra sciverit
nosque aurum abusos? quid mihi fiet postea? 360

The old man will go to Ephesus to fetch the gold and
we’ll be living a downy life of it here, that is, if the
old chap leaves us here and doesn’t drag me and Mnesilochus
along with him. Oh, won’t I turn things upside down here!
(_pauses_) But what’ll happen when the old man discovers
it? When he finds out he’s gone on a wild goose chase and
we’ve used up the cash? What will happen to me then?

credo hercle adveniens nomen mutabit mihi
facietque extemplo Crucisalum me ex Chrysalo.
aufugero hercle, si magis usus venerit.
si ero reprehensus, macto ego ilium infortunio:
si illi sunt virgae ruri, at mihi tergum domist.
nunc ibo, erili filio hanc fabricam dabo
super auro amicaque eius inventa Bacchide.

Gad! I suppose he’ll change my name for me the minute he
gets back, and transform me from Chrysalus to Crossalus on
the spot. Oh, well, I’ll run for it, if it looks advisable.
If I am caught, he’ll have his fill of discomfort: if he’s
got rods on the farm, well, I’ve got a back on my person.
Now I’ll be off and let the young master know about this
gold trick and his mistress Bacchis being found.
[EXIT Chrysalus.

ACTVS III