Chapter I: Part 1

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THE LADY OF PLEASVRE.

A COMEDIE,

As it was Acted by her Majesties Servants, at the private House in _Drury_ Lane.

Written by _James Shirly_.

_LONDON_, Printed by _Tho. Cates_, for _Andrew Crooke_, and _William Cooke_. 1637.

Persons of the Comedy.

_Lord._ _Sir Thomas Bornewell._ _Sir William Sentlove._ _Mr. Alex. Kickshaw._ _Mr. John Littleworth._ _Mr. Hairecut._ _Mr. Fredericke._ Steward to the Lady _Aretina_. Steward to the Lady _Celestina_. _Secretary._ _Servants, &c._

_Aretina_, Sir _Thomas Bornwells_ Lady. _Celestina_, a young Widow. _Isabella._ _Mariana._ _Madam Decoy._

Scene the Strand.

TO THE RIGHT HONORABLE RICHARD LORD LOVELACE _of_ Hurley.

My Lord,

I _Cannot want encouragement to present a Poeme to your Lordship, while you possesse so noble a breast, in which so many seedes of honour, to the example and glory of your Name obtain'd, before your yeares a happy maturity. This Comedy fortunate in the Scene, and one that may challenge a place in the first forme of the Authors compositions, most humbly addresseth it selfe to your honour, if it meete your_ _gracious acceptance, and that you repent not to be a Patron, your Lordshipps will onely crownes the imagination, and for ever by this favour oblige_,

My Lord _The most humble Services_ _of your Honourer_, IAMES SHIRLY.

The Lady of Pleasure.

_The First Act._

_Enter_ Aretina _and her Steward_.

_Stew._ Be patient Madam, you may have your pleasure.

_Are._ Tis that I came to towne for, I wo'd not Endure againe the countrey conversation, To be the Lady of sixe shires I the men So neare the Primitive making, they retaine A sence of nothing but the earth, their braines And barren heads standing as much in want Of plowing as their ground, to heare a fellow Make himselfe merry and his horse with whisteling Sellingers round, to observe with what solemnitie They keepe their Wakes, and throw for pewter Candlestickes, How they become the Morris, whith whose bells They ring all into Whitson Ales, and sweate, Through twenty Scarffes and Napkins, till the Hobbyhorse Tire, and the maide Marrian dissolv'd to a gelly, Be kept for spoone meate.

_Ste._ These with your pardon are no Argument To make the country life appeare so hatefull, At least to your particular, who enjoy'd A blessing in that calme; would you be pleasd To thinke so, and the pleasure of a kingdome, While your owne will commanded what should move Delight, your husbands love and power joyned To give your life more harmony, you liv'd there, Secure and innocent, beloved of all, Praisd for your hospitality, and praid for, You might be envied, but malice knew Not where you dwelt, I wo'd not prophecy But leave to your owne apprehension What may succeede your change.

_Are._ You doe imagine, No doubt, you have talk'd wisely, and confuted, London past all defence, your Master should Doe well to send you backe into the countrie, With title of Superintendent Baylie.

_Ste._ How Madam.

_Are._ Even so sir.

_Ste._ I am a Gentleman though now your servant.

_Are._ A country-gentleman, By your affection to converse with stuble, His tenants will advance your wit, and plumpe it so With beefe and bag-pudding.

_Ste._ You may say your pleasure, It becomes not me dispute.

_Are._ Complaine to the Lord of the soyle your master.

_Ste._ Y'are a woman of an ungovern'd passion, and I pitty you.

_Enter Sir Thomas Bornwell._

_Bor._ How how? Whats the matter?

_Ste._ Nothing Sir.

_Bor._ Angry sweeteheart?

_Are._ I am angry with my selfe, To be so miserably restrained in things, Wherein it doth concern your love and honour To see me satisfied.

_Bor._ In what _Aretina_? Dost thou accuse me? have I not obeyd All thy desires, against mine owne opinion, Quitted the countrie, and removed the hope Of our returne, by sale of that faire Lordship We liv'd in, chang'd a calme and retire life For this wild towne, composd of noise and charge.

_Are._ What charge more than is necessarie, For a lady of my birth and education?

_Bor._ I am not Ignorant, how much Nobilitie Flowes in your bloud, your kinsmen great and powerfull, I'th State, but with this lose not your memory Of being my wife, I shall be studious Madam to give the dignitie of your birth All the best ornaments which become my fortune But would not flatter it, to ruine both, And be the fable of the towne, to teach Other men losse of wit by mine, emploid To serve your vast expences. _Are._ Am I then Brought in the ballance? so Sir. _Bo._ Though you weigh Me in a partiall scale my heart is honest, And must take libertie to thinke you have Obeyed no modest counsell to effect, Nay study wayes of pride and costly ceremony, Your change of gaudy furniture and pictures, Of this Italian Master, and that Dutchmans. Your mighty looking-glasses like Artillery; Brought whom on Engins the superfluous plate, Anticke and novell, vanities of fires, Fourescore pound suppers for my Lord your kinsman, Banquets for tother Lady, aunt, and cozens, And perfumes that exceede all traine of servants, To stifle us at home and shew abroad More motley than the French, or the Venetian, About your Coach whose rude Postillion Must pester every narrow lane, till passengers And tradsmen curse your choaking up their stalls; And common cries pursue your Ladiship, For hindring o'their market. _Are._ Have you done sir.

_Bor._ I could accuse the gayetie of your wardrobe, And prodigall embroderies under which Rich Sattens, Plushes, cloath of Silver, dare Not shew their owne complexions, your jewells Able to burne out the Spectators eyes, And shew like Bonefires on you by the tapers, Something might here be spar'd, which safely of Your birth and honour, since the truest wealth, Shines from the soule, and drawes up just admirers, I could urge something more: _Are._ Pray doe I like Your homilie of thrifte. _Bo._ I could wish Madam You would not game so much. _Are._ A gamster too?

_Bor._ But are not come to that repentance yet, Should teach you skill enough to raise your profit, You looke not through the subtiltie of Cards, And mysteries of Dice, nor can you save Charge with the boxe, buy petticotes and purles, And keepe your familie by the precious income, Nor doe I wish you should, my poorest servant Shall not upbraid my tables, nor his hire Purchasd beneath my honour, you make play Not a Pastime but a tyrannie, and vexe Your selfe and my estate by't. _Are._ Good, proceed.

_Bor._ Another game you have, which consumes more Your fame than purse, your revells in the night, Your meetings cal'd the Ball, to which appeare, As to the Court of Pleasure, all your gallants, And Ladies thither bound by a Subpena Of _Venus_, and small _Cupids_ high displeasure, Tis but the family of love translated Into more costly sinne, there was a play on't, And had the Poet not beene brib'd to a modest Expression of your Anticke gambolls in't, Some darkes had beene discovered, and the deeds too, In time he may repent and make some blush, To see the second part danc'd on the Stage; My thoughts acquit you for dishonoring me By any foule act, but the vertuous know, Tis not enough to cleare our selves, but the Suspitions of our shame. _Are._ Have you concluded Your lecture? _Bor._ I ha done, and howsoever My language my appeare to you, it carries No other than my faire and just intent To your delights without curbe to their modestie And noble freedome. _Are._ Ile not be so tedious, In my reply, but without arte or elegance, Assure you I keepe still my first opinion, And though you vay'le, your avaritious meaning With hansome names of modesty, and thrift, I finde you would intrench and wound the liberty I was borne with, were my desires unpriviledged By example, while my judgement thought 'em fit, You ought not to oppose, but when the practise And tract of every honourable Lady, Authorise me, I take it great injustice, To have my pleasures circumscribed, and taught me, A narrow minded husband is a theefe To his owne fame, and his preferment too, He shuts his parts and fortunes from the world. While from the popular vote and knowledge men Rise to imployment in the state. _Bor._ I have No great ambition to buy preferment At so deare rate. _Are._ Nor I to sell my honour, By living poore and sparingly, I was not Bred in that ebbe of fortune, and my fate Shall not compell me too't. _Bor._ I know not Madam, But you pursue these wayes. _Are._ What wayes?

_Bor._ In the strict sence of honestie I dare Make oath, they are Innocent. _Are._ Do not divert, By busie troubling of your braine, those thoughts That should preserve em. _Bor._ How was that?

_Are._ Tis English.

_Bor._ But carries some unkinde sence.

_Enter Madam Decoy._

_De._ Good morrow my sweete Madam.

_Are._ _Decoy_ welcome, this visite is a favour.

_De._ Alas sweet Madam, I cannot stay, I came But to present my service to your Ladiship; I could not passe by your doore, but I must take The boldnesse to render my respects.

_Are._ You oblige me Madam, but I must Not dispence so with your absence.

_De._ Alas, the Coach Madam stayes for me at the doore.

_Are._ Thou shalt command mine, prethee sweete _Decoy_.

_De._ I wou'd waite on you Madam, but I have many Visits to make this morning I beseech.

_Are._ So you will promise to dine with me. _De._ I shall Present a guest. _Are._ Why then good morrow Madam.

_De._ A happy day shine on your Ladiship. _Exit._

_Enter Steward._

_Are._ Whats your newes sir? _St._ Madam two gentlemen.

_Are._ What gentlemen? Have they no names. _St._ They are The gentleman with his owne head of haire, Whom you commended for his horsemanship In Hide Parke, and becomming the saddle The tother day. _Are._ What circumstance is this, To know him by. _St._ His names at my tongues end, He lik'd the fashion of your pearle chaine Madam, And borrowed it for his Jewelier to take A coppie by it. _Bor._ What cheating gallants this?

_St._ That never walkes without a Ladies buske, And playes with fannes Mr. _Alexander Kickshaw_, I thought I should remember him. _Are._ Whats the other?

_St._ What an unluckie memorie I have? The gallant that still danceth in the streete, And weares a grosse of Ribbon in his hat, That carries _Oringado_ in his pocket, And Suger-plumbs to sweeten his discourse, That studies complement, defies all wit On blacke and censures playes that are not bawdy, Mr. _John Littleworth_. _Are._ They are welcome, but Pray entertaine them a small time, lest I Be unprovided. _Bor._ Did they aske for me?

_Ste._ No sir. _Bor._ It matters not, they must be welcome.

_Are._ Fie, how's this haire disordered? here's a curle, Straddle most impiously, I must to my closet. _Exit._

_Bor._ Waite on em my Lady will returne agen, I have to such a height fulfill'd her humor, All applications dangerous, these gallants Must be received or shee will fall into A tempest, and the house be shooke with names Of all her kindred, tis a servitude, I may in time shake off.

_Enter Alexander and Littleworth._

_Al. Lit._ Save you Sir _Thomas_.

_Bor._ Save you gentlemen. _Al._ I kisse your hand.

_Bor._ What day is it abroad?

_Lit._ The morning rises from your Ladies eye, If she looke cleare we take the happy omen Of a faire day. _Bo._ Sheele instantly appeare, To the discredit of your complement, But you expresse your wit thus. _Al._ And you modestie, Nor to affect praises of your owne.

_Bor._ Leaving this subject, what games now on foote? What exercise carries the generall vote? Oth towne now nothing moves without your knowledge.

_Al._ The cocking now has all the noise, Ile have A hundred peeces of one battle, Oh, These birds of _Mars_! _Lit._ _Venus_ is _Mars_ his bird too.

_Al._ Why and the pretty Doves are _Venusses_, To show that kisses draw the Charriot.

_Lit._ I am for that skirmish. _Bor._ When shall wee have More Booths and Bag-pipes upon Bansted downes, No mighty race is expected, but my Lady returnes.

_Enter Aretina._

_Are._ Faire morning to you gentlemen, You went not late to bed by your early visit, You doe me honour. _Al._ It becomes our service.

_Are._ What newes abroade? you hold precious intelligence.

_Lit._ All tongues are so much busie with your praise, They have not time to frame other discourse, Will please you Madam? tast a Sugerplum.

_Bor._ What do's the Goldsmith thinke the Pearle is worth You borrowed of my Lady? _Al._ Tis a rich one.

_Bor._ She has many other toyes whose fashion you, Will like extremely, you have no intention To buy any of her Iewels. _Al._ Vnderstand me.

_Bor._ You had rather sell perhaps, but leaving this? I hope you'le dine with us.

_Al._ I came a purpose.

_Are._ And where were you last night? _Al._ I Madam? where I slept not, it had beene sin where so much Delight and beauty was to keepe me waking, There is a Lady Madam will be worth Your free societie, my conversation Nere knew so elegant and brave a soule, With most incomparable flesh and bloud, So spirited, so Courtly speakes the Languages, Sings, Dances, playes o'th Lute to admiration, Is faire and paints not, games too, keepes a table, And talkes most witty Satyre, has a wit Of a cleane Mercury.

_Lit._ Is shee married? _Al._ No.

_Are._ A Virgin? _Al._ Neither. _Lit._ What a widow? something Of this wide commendation might have beene Excusd, this such a prodigie? _Al._ Repent Before I name her, shee did never see Yet full sixteene, an age in the opinion Of wise men not contemptible, she ha's Mourned out her yeare too for the honest Knight That had compassion of her youth, and dy'd So timely, such a widow is not common, And now she shines more fresh and tempting Then any naturall Virgin.

_Are._ Whats her name?

_Al._ Shee was Christened _Celestina_, by her husband The Lady _Bellamour_, this Ring was hers.

_Bor._ You borrowed it to coppie out the Posie.

_Al._ Are they not pretty Rubies? twas a grace She was pleasd to shew me, that I might have one Made of the same fashion, for I love All prettie formes. _Are._ And is she glorious?

_Al._ She is full of Jewels Madam, but I am Most taken with the bravery of her minde, Although her garments have all grace and ornament.

_Are._ You have beene high in praises. _Al._ I come short, No flattery can reach her. _Bor._ Now my Lady Is troubled as she feared to be eclipsd, This newes will cost me somewhat. _Are._ You deserve Her favour for this noble character.

_Al._ And I possesse it by my starres benevolence.

_Are._ You must bring us acquainted. _Bo._ I pray doe sir, I long to see her too, Madam I have Thought upon't and corrected my opinion, Pursue what wayes of pleasure your desires Incline you too, not onely with my state, But with my person I will follow you, I see the folly of my thrift, and will Repent in Sacke and prodigalitie To your owne hearts content.

_Are._ But doe not mocke.

_Bor._ Take me to your imbraces gentlemen And tutor me. _Lit._ And will you kisse the Ladies?

_Bor._ And sing and dance, I long to see this beauty, I wood faine lose a hundred pounds at dice now, Thou sha't have another gowne and petticote, To morrow will you sell my running horses? We have no Greeke wine in the house I thinke, Pray send one of our footemen to the Merchant, And throw the hogsheads of March-beare into The kenell, to make roome for Sackes and Clarret, What thinke you to be drunke yet before dinner? We will have constant musicke and maintaine Them and their Fidles in phantasticke liveries, Ile tune my voyce to catches, I must have My dyning roome enlarg'd to invite Embassadors, Wee'le feast the parish in the fields, and teach The Military men new discipline, Who shall charge all their new Artillerie With Oringes and Lemonds, boy to play All dinner upon our capons. _Al._ Hee's exalted.

_Bor._ I will doe any thing to please my Lady, Let that suffice and kisse oth same condition, I am converted, doe not you dispute But patiently allow the miracle. _Enter Servant._

_Are._ I am glad to heare you sir in so good tune.

_Ser._ Madam the Painter. _Are._ I am to sit this morning.

_Bor._ Doe, while I give new directions to my Steward.

_Al._ With your favour we'le waite on you, sitting's but A melancholy exercise without Some company to discourse. _Are._ It does conclude A Ladies morning worke, we rise, make fine, Sit for our Picture, and tis time to dine.

_Lit._ Praying's forgot. _Al._ Tis out of fashion. _Exeunt._

_Enter Celestina and her Steward._

_Cel._ Fie, what an aire this roome has. _St._ Tis perfum'd.

_Cel._ With some cheape stuffe is it your wisedomes thrift To infect my nostrils thus? Or i'st to favour The Gout in your worships hand? You are afraid To exercise your pen in your account Booke? Of doe you doubt my credit to discharge Your bills.

_St._ Madam, I hope you have not found My dutie with the guilt of sloath or jealousie, Vnapt to your command. _Cel._ You can extenuate Your faults with language sir, but I expect To be obeyed; What hangings have we here?

_St._ They are Arras Madam. _Cel._ Impudence I know't, I will have fresher and more rich, not wrought With faces that may scandalise a Christian With Iewish stories stufft with Corne and Camells, You had best wrap all my chambers in wild Irish, And make a nursery of Monsters here, To fright the Ladies comes to visite me.

_St._ Madam I hope. _Cel._ I say I will have other, Good Master Steward of a finer loome, Some silke and silver if your worship please, To let me be at so much cost Ile have Stories to fit the seasons of the yeare, And change as often as I please. _St._ You shall Madam.

_Cel._ I am bound to your consent forsooth, and is My coach brought home?

_St._ This morning I expect it.

_Cel._ The inside as I gave direction, Of crimson plush. _St._ Of crimson Camell plush.

_Cel._ Ten thousand mothes consum't, shall I ride through The streets in penance wrapt up round in haire cloath, Sel't to an Alderman, twill serve his wife To goe a feasting to their country house, Or fetch a Merchants Nurse child, and come home Laden with fruite and Cheese-cakes; I despise it.

_St._ The nailes adorne it Madam, set in method And pretty formes. _Cel._ But single guilt I warrant.

_St._ No Madam. _Cel._ Another Solecisme, oh fie, This fellow will bring me to a Consumption With fretting at his ignorance, some Lady Had rather never pray, than goe to Church in't; The nailes not double guilt? to market wo't, Twill hackny out to Mile-end, or convey Your citie tumblers to be drunke with Creame And Prunes at Islington. _St._ Good Madam heare me.

_Cel._ Ile rather be beholding to my Aunt The Countesse for her mourning coach, then be Disparag'd so, shall any juggling tradsman Be at charge to shooe his running horse with gold, And shall my coach nailes be but single guilt? How dare these knaves abuse me so? _St._ Vouchsafe To heare me speake. _Cel._ Is my Sedan yet finish'd? And liveries for my men--Mules according As I gave charge. _St._ Yes Madam it is finish'd, But without tilting plumes at the foure corners, The scarlet's pure, but not embroidered.

_Cel._ What mischiefe were it to your conscience Were my coach lin'd with tissue, and my harnesse Cover'd with needleworke? if my Sedan Had all the story of the Prodigall, Embrodered with pearle. _St._ Alas good Madam, I know tis your owne cost, I am but your Steward, And wod discharge my duty the best way, You have beene pleasd to heare me, tis not for My profit, that I manage your estate, And save expence, but for your honour Madam.

_Cel._ How sir, my honour? _St._ Though you heare it not, Mens tongues are liberall in your character, Since you began to live thus high, I know Your fame is precious to you. _Cel._ I were best Make you my governor; audacious Varlet, How dare you interpose your doting counsell? Mind your affaires with more obedience, Or I shall ease you of an office sir, Must I be limited to please your honour? Or for the vulgar breath confine my pleasures, I will pursue 'em in what shapes I fancie, Here, and abroad, my entertainements shall Be oftner, and more rich, who shall controule me? I live i'th strand, whether few Ladies come To live, and purchase, more than fame, I will Be hospitable then, and spare no cost That may engage all generous report To trumpet forth my bounty and my braverie, Till the Court envie, and remove, Ile have My house the Academy of wits, who shall Exalt with rich Sacke, and Sturgeon, Write Panegyricks of my feasts, and praise The method of my wittie superfluities, The horses shall be taught with frequent waiting Vpon my gates, to stop in their careere Toward Charing-crosse, spight of the Coachmans fury. And not a tilter, but shall strike his plume, When he sailes by my window, my Balconie Shall be the Courtiers Idoll, and more gaz'd at, Than all the Pageantry at Temple barre, By countrey Clients. _St._ Sure my Ladie's mad.

_Cel._ Take that for your ill manners. _St._ Thanke you Madam, I would there were lesse quicksilver in your fingers. _Exit._

_Cel._ There's more than simple honesty in a servant Requir'd to his full dutie, none should dare, But with a looke, much lesse a sawcie language Checke at their Mistresse pleasure, I'me resolv'd To pay for some delight, my estate will beare it, Ile reine it shorter when I please.

_Enter Steward._

_St._ A gentleman Desires to speake with your Ladiship. _Cel._ His name?

_St._ He saies you know him not, he seemes to be Of qualitie. _Cel._ Admit him. Sir with me.

_Enter Hairecut._

_Ha._ Madam I know not, how you may receive This boldnesse from me, but my faire intents Knowne, will incline you to be charitable.

_Cel._ No doubt sir. _Ha._ He must live obscurely Madam, That hath not heard what vertues you possesse, And I a poore admirer of your fame, Am come to kisse your hand. _Cel._ That all your businesse?

_Ha._ Though it were worth much travell, I have more In my ambition. _Cel._ Speake it freely sir.

_Ha._ You are a widow. _Cel._ So. _Ha._ And I a Bachelor.

_Cel._ You come a wooing sir, and would perhaps Shew me a way to reconcile thee two.

_Ha._ And blesse my starres for such a happinesse.

_Cel._ I like you sir the better, that you doe not Wander about, but shoote home to the meaning, Tis a confidence will make a man Know sooner what to trust to, but I never Saw you before, and I beleeve you come not With hope to finde me desperate upon marriage, If maides out of their ignorance of what Men, are refuse these offers, widowes may Out of their knowledge be allow'd some coynesse, And yet I know not how much happinesse A peremptorie answer may deprive me of, You may be some young Lord, and though I see not Your footmen and your groome, they may not be Farre off in conference with your horse, please you To instruct me with your title, against which I would not willingly offend. _Ha._ I am A gentleman, my name is _Hairecut_ madam.

_Cel._ Sweete Mr. _Hairecut_, are you a Courtier?

_Ha._ Yes. _Cel._ J did thinke so by your confidence, Not to detaine you sir with circumstance, J was not so unhappy in my husband But that tis possible I may be a wife Agen, but I must tell you, he that winnes My affection shall deserve me. _Ha._ J will hope If you can love, J shanot present Madam An object to displease you in my person, And when time, and your patience shall possesse you With further knowledge of me, and the truth Of my devotion, you will not repent The offer of my service. _Cel._ You say well. How long doe you imagine you can love sir? Is it a Quotidian, or will it hold But every other day? _Ha._ You are pleasant Madam.

_Cel._ Dost take you with a burning at the first, Or with a cold fit for you gentlemen Have both your Summer, and your Winter service.

_Ha._ J am ignorant what you meane, but J shall never Be cold in my affection to such beautie.

_Cel._ And twill be somewhat long ere J be warme in't.

_Ha._ If you vouchsafe me so much honour Madam, That J may waite on you sometimes, J shanot Despaire to see a change. _Cel._ But now J know Your minde, you shall not neede to tell it, when You come agen, J shall remember it.

_Ha._ You make me fortunate. _Enter Steward._

_St._ Madam your kinswomen The Lady _Novice_ and her sister are New lighted from their coach. _Cel._ I did expect e'm, They partly are my pupills, ile attend e'm.

_Ha._ Madam I have beene too great a trespasser Vpon your patience, ile take my leave, You have affaires, and I have some imployment Calls me to Court, I shall present agen A servant to you. _Cel._ Sir you may present, _Exit Ha._ But not give fire I hope, now to the Ladies This recreation's past, the next must be To read to them some Court Philosophie. _Exeunt._

_The second Act._

_Enter sir Thomas Bornewell._

Tis a strange humour I have undertaken To dance, and play, and spend as fast as she does, But I am resolv'd, it may doe good upon her, And fright her into thrift, nay ile endeavour To make her jealous too, if this doe not Allay her gamboling, shee's past a woman And onely a miracle must tame her.

_Enter Steward._

_St._ Tis Mr. _Fredericke_ my Ladies nephew. _Bo._ What of him?

_St._ Is come from the Universitie. _Bo._ By whose directions?

_St._ It seemes my Ladies. _Bo._ Let me speake with him Before he see his Aunt, I doe not like it.

_Enter Mr. Fredericke._

Mr. _Fredericke_ welcome I expected not So soone your presence, what's the hasty cause?

_Fr._ These letters from my Tutor will acquaint you.

_St._ Welcome home sweet Mr. _Fredericke_. _Fr._ Where's my Aunt?

_St._ Shee's busie about her painting, in her closet, The Outlandish man of Art, is copying out Her countenance. _Fr._ She is sitting for her picture.

_St._ Yes sir, and when tis drawne, she will be hang'd Next the French Cardinall in the dining roome, But when she heares you'r come, she will dismisse The Belgicke gentleman to entertaine Your worship. _Fr._ Change of aire has made you witty.

_Bo._ Your Tutor gives you a hansome character _Fredericke_, and is sorry your Aunts pleasure Commands you from your studies, but I hope You have no quarrell to the liberall arts, Learning is an addition beyond Nobilitie of birth, honour of bloud Without the ornament of knowledge is A glorious ignorance.

_Fr._ I never knew more sweet and happy houres Than I emploid upon my bookes, I heard A part of my Philosophy, and was so Delighted with the harmony of nature, I could have wasted my whole life upon't.

_Bo._ Tis pitty a rash indulgence should corrupt So faire a Genius, shee's here, ile observe.

_Enter Aretina. Alexander. Littleworth. Steward._

_Fr._ My most lov'd Aunt. _Are._ Support me, J shall faint.

_Lit._ What ailes your Ladiship? _Are._ Is that _Fredericke_, In blacke. _Alex._ Yes Madam, but the doublets Sattin.

_Are._ The boy's undone. _Fre._ Madam you appeare troubled.

_Are._ Have J not cause? Was not J trusted with Thy education boy, and have they sent thee Home like a very scholler. _Alex._ Twas ill done How ere they usd him in the Vniversitie, To send him to his friends thus. _Fre._ Why sir, blacke (For tis the colour that offends your eyesight) Is not within my reading any blemish, Sables are no disgrace in Heraldry.

_Alex._ Tis comming from the Colledge thus, that makes it Dishonorable, while you ware it for Your father, it was commendable, or were Your Aunt dead, you might mourne and justifie.

_Are._ What lucke I did not send him into France, They would have given him generous education, Taught him another garbe, to weare his locke, And shape, as gawdie as the Summer, how To dance, and wagge his feather ala mode, To complement, and cringe, to talke not modestly Like J forsooth, and no forsooth, to blush And looke so like a Chaplaine, there he might Have learned a brazen confidence, and observ'd So well the custome of the countrey, that He might by this time have invented fashions For us, and beene a benefit to the Kingdome Preserv'd our Tailors in their wits, and sav'd The charge of sending into forraine Courts For pride and anticke fashions, observe, In what a posture he does hold his hat now.

_Fr._ Madam with your pardon, you have practisd Another dialect then was taught me when I was commended to your care and breeding, I understand not this, Latine or Greeke Are more familiar to my apprehension, Logicke was not so hard in my first lectures As your strange language. _Are._ Some strong waters, oh!

_Lit._ Comfits will be as comfortable to your stomacke Madam.

_Are._ I feare hee's spoild forever, he did name Logicke, and may for ought I know be gone So farre to understand it, I did alwayes Suspect they would corrupt him in the Colledge, Will your Greeke sawes and sentences discharge The Mercer, or is Latin a fit language To court a mistresse in? Mr. _Alexander_ If you have any charitie, let me Commend him to your breeding, I suspect I must employ my Doctor first, to purge The Vniversitie that lies in's head It alters his complexion. _Alex._ If you dare Trust me to serve him. _Are._ Mr. _Littleworth_ Be you joynd in commission. _Lit._ I will teach him Postures and rudiments. _Are._ I have no patience To see him in this shape, it turnes my stomacke, When he has cast his Academicke skinne He shall be yours, I am bound in conscience To see him bred, his owne state shall maintaine The change, while hees my Ward, come hither sir.

_Fr._ What does my Aunt meane to doe with me?

_St._ To make you a fine gentleman, and translate you Out of your learned language sir, into The present Goth and Vandall, which is French.

_Bo._ Into what mischiefe wilt this humour ebbe? Shee will undo the boy, I see him ruind, My patience is not manly, but I must Vse stratagem to reduce her, open wayes Give me no hope. _Exit._

_St._ You shall be obey'd Madam. _Exeunt._

_Fr._ Mr. _Steward_, are you sure we doe not dreame? Was't not my Aunt you talkt to. _St._ One that loves you Deare as her life, these cloathes doe not become you, You must have better sir. _Fr._ These are not old.

_St._ More sutable to the towne and time, we keepe No Lent here, nor is't my Ladies pleasure you Should fast from any thing you have a minde to, Vnlesse it be your learning, which she would have you Forget with all convenient speed that may be, For the credit of your noble family. The case is alter'd since we liv'd i'th country, We doe not invite the poore o'th parish To dinner, keepe a table for the tenants, Our kitchen does not smell of beefe, the sellar Defies the price of malt and hops, the footmen And coachdrivers may be drunke like gentlemen With wine, nor will three Fidlers upon holidayes With aid of Bagge pipes, that cald in the countrey To dance, and plough the hall up with their hobnailes, Now make my Lady merry, wee doe feed Like princes, and feast nothing but princes, And are these robes fit to be seene amongst em.

_Fr._ My Lady keepes a court then, is Sir _Thomas_ Affected with this state and cost. _Ste._ He was not, But is converted, and I hope you wo'not Persist in heresie, but take a course Of riot to content your friends, you shall Want nothing, if you can be proud and spend it For my Ladies honour, here are a hundred Peeces, will serve you till you have new clothes, I will present you with a nag of mine Poore tender of my service please you accept, My Ladies smile more than rewards me for it, I must provide fit servants to attend you, Monsieures for horse and foote. _Fr._ I shall submit If this be my Aunts pleasure and be ruld, My eyes are open'd with this purse already, And Sacke will helpe to inspire me, I must spend it.

_St._, What else sir? _Fr._ Ile begin with you, to incourage You, to have still a speciall care of me, There is five peeces, not for your nag.

_St._ No sir, I hope it is not. _Fr._ Buy a Beaver For thy owne blocke, I shall be ruld, who does Command the wineseller? _St._ Who command but you sir?

_Fr._ Ile try to drinke a health or two, my Aunts Or any bodies, and if that foundation Stagger me not too much, I will commence In all the arts of London. _St._ If you finde sir The operation of the wine, exalt Your bloud to the desire of any femall Delight, I know your Aunt wonot deny Any of her chambermaides to practise on, She loves you but too well. _Fr._ I know not how I may be for that exercise, farewell _Aristotle_, Prethee commend me to the Library At Westminster, my bones I bequeath thither, And to the learned wormes that meane to visit 'em, I will compose my selfe, I beginne to thinke I have lost time indeed, come to the wineseller. _Exit._

_Enter Celestina, Mardana, Isabella._

_Ma._ But shall we not Madam expose our selves To censure for this freedome. _Cel._ Let them answer That dare mistake us, shall we be so much Cowards to be frighted from our pleasure, Because men have malitious tongues, and shew What miserable soules they have, no cozen, We hold our life and fortunes, upon no Mans charitie, if they dare shew so little Discretion to traduce our fames, we will Be guilty of so much wit to laugh at em.

_Is._ Tis a becomming fortitude. _Cel._ My starres Are yet kinde to me, for in a happy minute Be't spoke, I'me not in love, and men shall never Make my heart leane with sighing, nor with teares Draw on my eyes the infamie of spectacles, Tis the chiefe principle to keepe your heart Vnder your owne obedience, jeast, but love not, I say my prayers yet, can weare good clothes, And onely satisfie my tailor for em. I wonot lose my priviledge.

_Ma._ And yet they say your entertainments are, Give me your pardon Madam, to proclaime Your selfe a widow, and to get a husband.

_Cel._ As if a Lady of my yeares, some beautie Left by her husband rich, that had mourn'd for him A twelve moneth too, could live so obscure i'th towne That gallants would not know her, and invite Themselves without her chargeable proclamations; Then we are worse than Citizens, no widow Left wealthy can be throughly warme in mourning, But some one noble bloud or lusty kindred Claps in, with his gilt coach, and Flandrian trotters, And hurries her away to be a Countesse. Courtiers have spies, and great ones with lharge titles, Cold in their owne estates, would warme themselves At a rich city bonefire.

_Is._ Most true Madam.

_Cel._ No matter for corruption of the bloud, Some undone Courtier made her husband rich, And this new Lord receives it backe againe. Admit it were my policie, and that My entertainements pointed to acquaint me With many sutors, that I might be safe, And make the best election, could you blame me?

_Ma._ Madam tis wisdome. _Cel._ But I should be In my thoughts miserable to be fond Of leaving the sweet freedome I possesse, And court my selfe into new marriage fetters, I now observe mens severall wits, and windings, And can laugh at their follies. _Ma._ You have given A most ingenious satisfaction.

_Cel._ One thing ile tell you more, and this I give you Worthy your imitation from my practise, You see me merry, full of song and dancing, Pleasant in language, apt to all delights That crowne a publike meeting, but you cannot Accuse me of being prodigall of my favours To any of my guests, I doe not summon By any winke, a gentleman to follow me, To my withdrawing chamber, I heare all Their pleaes in Court, nor can they boast abroad And doe me justice, after a salute They have much conversation with my lippe, I hold the kissing of my hand a courtesie, And he that loves me, must upon the strength Of that, expect till I renew his favour. Some Ladies are so expensive in their graces, To those that honour 'em, and so prodigall That in a little time, they have nothing but The naked sinne left to reward their servants, Whereas a thrift in our rewards, will keepe Men long in their devotion, and preserve Our selves in stocke, to encourage those that honour us.

_Is._ This is an art worthy a Ladies practise.

_Cel._ It takes not from the freedome of our mirth, But seemes to advance it, when we can possesse Our pleasures with security of our honour, And that preservd, I welcome all the joyes My fancy can let in. In this I have given The copie of my minde, nor doe I blush, You understand it. _Enter Celestinaes gentlewoman._

_Is._ You have honord us.

_Gen._ Madam, Sir _William Sentlove_'s come to waite on you.

_Cel._ There's one would be a client, make excuse For a few minuts. _Mar._ One that comes a woing?

_Cel_. Such a thing he would seeme, but in his guiltinesse Of little land, his expectation is not So valiant as it might be, he weares cloathes, And feeds with noblemen, to some I heare No better than a wanton emissarie, Or scout for _Venus_ wild soule, which made tame, He thinkes no shame to stand court centinell, In hope of the reversion. _Mar._ I have heard That some of them are often my Lords tasters, The first fruits they condition for, and will Exact as fees for the promotion.

_Cel._ Let them agree, there's no account shall lie For me among their trafficke.

_Enter Gentlewo._

_Gen._ Mr. _Hairecut_ Madam Is new come in, to tender you his service.

_Cel._ Let him discourse a little with sir _William_. _Exit._

_Ma._ What is this gentleman Mr. _Hairecut_ Madam? I note him very gallant, and much courted By gentlemen of qualitie. _Cel._ I know not More than a trim gay man, he has some great office Sure by his confident behaviour, He would be entertaind under the title Of servant to me, and I must confesse, He is the sweetest of all men that visite me.

_Is._ How meane you Madam?

_Cel._ He is full of powder, He will save much in perfume for my chamber, Were he but constant here; give e'm accesse.

_Enter Sir Will. Sentlove, Mr. Hairecut._

_Sent._ Madam the humblest of your servants is Exalted to a happinesse, if you smile Vpon my visit.

_Ha._ I must begge your charitie Vpon my rudenesse Madam, I shall give That day up lost to any happinesse, When I forget to tender you my service.

_Cel._ You practise Courtship gentlemen. _Sent._ But cannot Find where with more desert to exercise it, What Ladie's this I pray? _Cel._ A kinswoman Of mine sir _William_. _Sent._ I am more her servant.

_Cel._ You came from Court, now I presume. _Ha._ Tis Madam The sphere I move in, and my destinie Was kinde to place me there, where J enjoy All blessings that a mortall can possesse, That lives not in your presence, and J should Fixe my ambition, when you would vouchsafe Me so much honour, to accept from me An humble entertainment there. _Cel._ But by What name shall I be knowne, in what degree Shall J be of kinred to you. _Hair._ How meane you Madam?

_Cel._ Perhaps you'le call me sister, I shall take it A speciall preferment, or it may be J may passe under title of your Mistresse, If I seeme rich, and faire enough, to engage Your confidence to owne me. _Ha._ J would hope.

_Cel._ But tis not come to that yet, you will sir Excuse my mirth.

_Ha._ Sweet Madam. _Cel._ Shall J take Boldnesse to aske what place you hold in Court? Tis an uncivill curiositie, But you'le have mercie to a womans question.

_Ha._ My present condition Madam, carries Honour and profit, though not to be nam'd With that employment J expect i'th state Which shall discharge the first maturitie Vpon your knowledge, untill then I begge You allow a modest silence. _Cel._ I am charmd sir, And if you scape embassador, you cannot Reach a preferment, wherein I'me against you, But where's sir _William Sentlove_?

_Ha._ Give him leave To follow his nose Madam, while he hunts In view, hee'le soone be at a fault. _Cel._ You know him.

_Ha._ Know _Sentlove_? not a page but can decipher him, The waitingwomen know him to a scruple, Hee's cal'd the Blistermaker of the towne.

_Cel._ Whats that?

_Is._ The laundry Ladies can resolve you, And you may guesse, an arrant Epicure As this day lives, borne to a prettie wit, A Knight but no gentleman; J must Be plaine to you, your Ladiship may have Vse of this knowledge, but conceale the author.

_Sen._ J kisse your fairest hand. _Mar._ You make a difference, Pray reconcile e'm to an equall whitenesse.

_Sent._ You wound my meaning Lady.

_Cel._ Nay sir _William_ Has the art of complement. _Sent._ Madam, you honor me 'Bove my desert of language. _Cel._ Will you please To enrich me with your knowledge of that gentleman.

_Sent._ Doe you not know him Madam. _Cel._ What is he?

_Sen._ A Camphire ball, you shall know more hereafter He shall tell you himselfe, and save my character, Till then, you see hee's proud.

_Cel._ One thing gentlemen I observe in your behaviour, which is rare In two that court one mistresse, you preserve A noble friendship, theres no gum within Your hearts, you cannot fret, or shew an envy Of one anothers hope, some would not governe Their passions with that temper. _Sent._ The whole world Shanot divorce our friendship. Mr _Hairecut_ Would I had lives to serve him, he is lost To goodnesse does not honour him. _Ha._ My knight!

_Cel._ This is right playing at Court Shuttlecocke.

_Enter Gentlew._

_Gen._ Madam, there is a gentleman desires To speake w'ee, one sir _Thomas Bornwell_. _Cel._ _Bornewell?_

_Gen._ He sayes he is a stranger to your Ladiship.

_Sen._ I know him. _Haire._ Your neighbour Madam.

_Sen._ Husband to the Lady, that so revells in the strand.

_Ha._ He has good parts they say, but cannot helpe His Ladies bias. _Cel._ They have both much fame Ith towne for severall merits, pray admit him.

_Ha._ What comes he for? _Enter sir Thomas._

_Bo._ Your pardon noble Lady, that I have Presum'd a stranger to your knowledge. _Cel._ Sir, Your worth was here before you, and your person Cannot be here ingratefull. _Bor._ Tis the bounty Of your sweet disposition Madam, make me Your servant lady by her faire example, To favour me--I never knew one turne Her cheeke to a gentleman that came to kisse her But sha'd a stinking breath, your servant gentlemen, _Will Sentlove_ how ist? _Cel._ I am sorry Coze To accuse you, we in nothing more betray Our selves to censure of ridiculous pride, Then answering a faire salute too rudely, Oh it shewes ill upon a gentlewoman Not to returne the modest lip, if she Would have the world beleeve, her breath is not Offensive. _Bor._ Madam, I have businesse With you. _Sent._ His lookes are pleasant. _Cel._ With me sir?

_Bor._ I heare you have an ex'lent wit Madam, I see your faire. _Cel._ The first is but report, And doe not trust your eyesight for the last, Cause I presume y'are mortall and may erre.

_Ha._ He is very gamesome. _Bor._ Y'ave an ex'lent voyce; They say you catcht it from a dying Swan, Which joyn'd to the sweete harmony of your lute, You ravish all mankind. _Cel._ Ravish mankind?

_Bo._ With their consent. _Cel._ It were the stranger rape, But there's the lesse inditement lies against it, And there is hope, your little honesties Cannot be much the worse, for men doe rather Beleeve they had a maiden head, then put Themselves to'th racke of memory, how long Tis since they left the burden of their innocence.

_Bo._ Why you are bitter Madam. _Cel._ So is physicke, I doe not know your constitution.

_Bo._ You shall if please you Madam. _Cel._ Y'are too hasty, I must examine what certificate You have, first to preferre you. _Bo._ Fine! certificate?

_Cel._ Vnder your Ladies hand, and seale. _Bor._ Go to, I see you are a wag. _Cel._ But take heede, how You trust too't. _Bor._ I can love you in my wedlocke, As well as that young gallant, oth first haire, Or the knight Bachelor, and can returne As amorous delight to thy soft bosome.

_Cel._ Your person and your language are both strangers.

_Bo._ But may be more familiar, I have those That dare make affidavit for my body.

_Cel._ D'ee meane your Surgeon? _Bor._ My Surgeon Madam? I know not how you value my abilities, But I dare undertake, as much, to expresse My service to your Ladiship, and with As fierce ambition, fly to your commands, As the most valiant of these, 'lay siege to you.

_Cel._ You dare not sir. _Bor._ How Madam? _Cel._ I will justifi't. You dare not marry me, and I imagine Some here should I consent, would fetch a priest Out of the fire. _Bor._ I have a wife indeede.

_Cel._ And there's a statute not repeald I take it.

_Bor._ Yar'e in the right I must confesse y'ave hit, And bled me in a master veine. _Cel._ You thinke I tooke you on the advantage, use your best Skill at defence, Ile come up to your valour And shew another worke you dare not doe, You dare not sir be vertuous. _Bor._ I dare, By this faire hand I dare, and aske a pardon If my rude words offend thy innocence, Which in a forme so beautifull, would shine To force a blush in them suspected it, And from the rest draw wonder. _Ha._ I like not Their secret parly, shall I interrupt em?

_Is._ By no meanes sir. _Sent._ Sir _Thomas_ was not wont To shew so much a Courtier. _Mar._ He cannot Be prejudiciall to you, suspect not Your owne deserts so much, hee's married.

_Bo._ I have other businesse Madam, you keepe musicke, I came to try how you can dance.

_Cel._ You did? Ile trie his humour out of breath, Although boast no cunning sir in revells, If you desire to shew your art that way, I can waite on you. _Bor._ You much honour me, Nay all must joyne to make a harmony.

_They dance._

_Bor._ I have nothing now, Madam, but to beseech After a pardon for my boldnesse, you Would give occasion to pay my gratitude, I have a house will be much honourd If you vouchsafe your presence, and a wife Desires to present her selfe your servant, I Came with the ambition to invite you, Deny me not, your person you shall trust On faire securitie. _Cel._ Sir, although I use not This freedome with a stranger, you shall have No cause to hold me obstinate. _Bor._ You grace me Sir _William Sentlove_-- _Ha._ I must take my leave, You will excuse me Madam, Court attendances----

_Cel._ By any meanes. _Bor._ Ladies you will vouchsafe Your company. _Is._ M. We waite upon you sir. _Exeunt._

_The third Act._

_Enter Lord unready. Hairecut preparing his Periwigge, Table, and Lookingglasse._

_Lor._ What houre ist? _Ha._ Bout three'a clocke my Lord.

_Bor._ Tis time to rise. _Ha._ Your Lordship went but late To bed last night. _Lor._ Twas early in the morning. _Enter Secre._

_Sec._ Expect a while, my Lord is busie?

_Lor._ Whats the matter? _Sec._ Here is a Lady Desires accesse to you upon some affaires She saies may specially concerne your Lordship.

_Lor._ A Lady? What her name? _Sec._ Madam _Decoy_.

_Lor._ _Decoy?_ prethee admit her. _Enter Decoy._ Have you businesse Madam With me? _Decoy._ And such I hope as will not be Offensive to your Lordship. _Lor._ I pray speake it.

_De._ I would desire your Lordships eare more private.

_Lor._ Waite i'th next chaber till I call, now Madam. _Exeunt._

_De._ Although I am a stranger to your Lordship I wo'd not lose a faire occasion offer'd, To shew how much I honour, and would serve you.

_Lor._ Please you to give me the particular That I may know the extent of my engagement, I am ignorant by what desert you should Be encouragd to have care of me. _De._ My Lord, I will take boldnesse to be plaine, beside Your other excellent parts, you have much fame For your sweet inclination to our sexe.

_Lor._ How dee meane Madam? _Dec._ I'that way your Lordship Hath honorably practisd upon some Not to be nam'd, your noble constancie To a mistresse hath deserv'd our generall vote, And I a part of woman kind have thought How to expresse my duty. _Lor._ In what Madam?

_Dec._ Be not so strange my Lord, I know the beauty And pleasures of your eyes, that hansome creature With whose faire life all your delight tooke leave, And to whose memory you have paid too much Sad tribute. _Lor._ Whats all this? _Dec._ This, if your Lordship Accept my service, in pure zeale to cure Your melancholy, I could point where you might Repaire your losse. _Lor._ Your Ladiship I conceive Doth trafficke in flesh marchandize. _De._ To men Of honour like your selfe, I am well knowne To some in court and come not with ambition Now to supplant your officer. _Lor._ What is The Lady of pleasure you preferre. _De._ A Lady Of birth and fortune, one upon whose vertue I may presume, the Lady _Aretina_.

_Lor._ Wife to sir _Thomas Bornwell_? _Dec._ The same sir.

_Lor._ Have you prepard her?

_De._ Not for your Lordship, till I have found your pulse, I am acquainted with her disposition She has a very appliable nature.

_Lor._ And Madam when expect you to be whipt For doing these fine favors. _De._ How my Lord? Your Lordship does but jeast I hope, you make A difference betweene a Lady that Does honorable offices, and one They call a bawd, your Lordship was not wont To have such course opinion of our practice.

_Lor._ The Lady _Aretina_ is my kinswoman.

_De._ What if she be my Lord? the nearer bloud The dearer sympathie. _Lor._ Ile have thee carted.

_De._ Your Lordship wonot so much staine your honour And education, to use a woman Of my qualitie.----_Lord._----Tis possible you may Be sent off with an honorable convoy Of Halberdeers. _De._ Oh my good Lord!

_Lor._ Your Ladiship shall be no protection If thou but staist three minutes. _De._ I am gone, When next you finde rebellion in your bloud, May all within ten mile o'th court turne honest. _Exit._

_Lor._ I doe not finde that pronenesse since the faire _Bella Maria_ died, my bloud is cold, Nor is there beautie enough surviving To highten me to wantonnesse, who waites? And what said my Lady? _Enter Hairecut._

_Ha._ The silent language of her face my Lord Was not so pleasant, as it shewd upon Her entrance. _Lor._ Would any man that meetes This Lady take her for a bawde. _Ha._ She does The trade an honor, credit to the profession, We may in time see baldnesse, quarter noses, And rotten legges to take the wall of footclothes.

_Lor._ I ha thought better, call the Lady backe, I wonot lose this opportunitie, Bid her not feare, the favour is not common, And ile reward it. I doe wonder much _Will Sentlove_ was not here to day.

_Ha._ I heard him say this morning, he would waite Vpon your Lordship. She is returnd sir. _Enter Secre. and Decoy._

_Sec._ Madam be confident my Lords not angry.

_Bor._ You returne welcome Madam, you are better Read in your art I hope then to be frighted With any shape of anger, when you bring Such newes to gentlemen, Madam you shall Soone understand how I accept the office.