Chapter I: Preface: (to Be Read)

The Dictionary says that a Preface is something spoken before. Usually it gives the author an opportunity to talk about himself. Some authors talk very much, especially about themselves, in their Preface. Mr. George Bernard Shaw writes more Preface than Book, and Théophile Gautier simply uses the Book as an excuse for the Preface. But you do not need to worry, as you will not read either of them for a very long time.

My Preface is going to be different. It is about something that comes at the end and not the beginning; furthermore, I am not going to talk about myself.

Of course you do not know what in the world I am driving at; I will come at once to the point. I had all but finished the stories of Lady Rumdidoodledum’s children when I received the following letter. I have a pretty good idea that “L. H. D.” is no other than the Child-Person for whom Lady Rumdidoodledum winked.

“MR. S. B. DINKELSPIEL,

“DEAR SIR,----

“I have the honor to inform you that Mrs. Sherman is the mother of a
lovely new baby daughter, born this evening. She is to be christened
‘Margaret,’ but will be known to her friends (of whom I trust you
will be among the number) as ‘Midge.’ Liza and Martha Mary are
delighted over the new arrival--the boys have not yet seen the little
lady.

“Hoping that she will prove as welcome to you as to the rest of her
very devoted family, I am, sir,

“Your very obedient servant and humble collaborator,

L. H. D.”
The Planet Venus.

A day or so later, a thick envelope came through the mail for me.

“Is it,” said I to myself, “another of my stories rejected by a heartless editor?”

It was not! It was the story of “Midge,” written by “L. H. D.,” and it came just in time, for I had been having a miserable hour seeking a last chapter for the book, and here one fell--I might say--out of the sunny sky.

S. B. DINKELSPIEL.

San Francisco, California.

CONTENTS

CHAPTER PAGE

I. IN WHICH WE MEET FLIP, ALTHOUGH HE WAS SUPPOSED
TO BE A SECRET 1

II. IN WHICH PETER SPILLS THE DEW OUT OF HIS POCKET AND IT
CAUSES A GREAT DEAL OF BOTHER, BUT MR. SMITH, WHO IS
THE KING OF FAIRIES, PUTS AN END TO THE TROUBLE 10

III. IN WHICH WE BEGIN TO REALIZE HOW CONVENIENT IT IS TO
HAVE A PERSON LIKE FLIP ABOUT THE PLACE, ESPECIALLY
WHEN THERE IS NOTHING MUCH TO DO; ALSO WE HEAR OF
MR. MORIARITY AND THE FAIRY WHO DID NOT HAVE A RED
CHIN BEARD AND A BALD HEAD 19

IV. IN WHICH MARTHA MARY INVADES THE CASTLE, AND FATHER
PROVES THAT HE CAN DO OTHER THINGS BESIDES WRITING
BUSINESS IN BIG BOOKS. ALSO SOMEONE ARRIVES 28

V. IN WHICH FLIP TELLS MY FAVORITE STORY, AND IF YOU DO
NOT LIKE IT VERY MUCH, FLIP KNOWS SOMEONE WHO WILL 40

VI. IN WHICH EDWARD LEE AND WALTER GO ON THE WARPATH
BECAUSE THEY DON’T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO, AND ON
ACCOUNT OF THEM JOHN AND MARTHA MARY MISS HEARING
THE MELODRAMA 49

VII. IN WHICH LIZA GOES UNDER THE SIDEBOARD; WALTER AND
EDWARD LEE FIX THE CAT, AND FLIP PROVES THAT THE
CITY FOGS ARE NICE 67

VIII. IN WHICH MARTHA MARY HAS A WONDERFUL DAY AND LEARNS
THE LOVELIEST OF SECRETS AND FLIP’S ASPIRATIONS
ARE EXPLAINED 76

IX. IN WHICH IS TOLD THE STORY OF ALFRED OF THE LOW COUNTRY,
AND JANICE, WHO LOVED THE QUEEN’S PAGE 85

X. IN WHICH JANE STAYS LONGER THAN SHE HAD EXPECTED TO AND
WE ENTERTAIN HER. AS USUAL, FLIP TELLS A STORY 99

XI. IN WHICH WALTER DOES NOT WANT NINE EIGHTS TO BE
SEVENTY-TWO; AND MARTHA MARY FEELS SO BADLY FOR HIM
THAT SHE GOES TO SEEK ADVENTURE. SHE FINDS IT 110

XII. IN WHICH ANOTHER JOHN AND ANOTHER MARY WANDER FURTHER
FROM HOME THAN THEY EVER HAVE BEEN BEFORE, AND FIND
A MARVELOUS BALL OF GLASS, IN WHICH ONE SEES THE
STRANGEST THINGS 120

XIII. IN WHICH FLIP USES NEEDLESSLY LONG WORDS, BUT, TO WIN
OUR GOOD-WILL AGAIN, HE TELLS A REAL OLD-FASHIONED
FAIRY TALE 133

XIV. IN WHICH WINFRED IS GIVEN THE MOST WONDERFUL WISH IN
THE WORLD, AND I ADVISE YOU ALL TO READ IT AND LEARN
WHAT IT IS, SO THAT IF, SOME DAY WHEN YOU ARE LEAST
EXPECTING IT, A FAIRY COMES AND OFFERS YOU A WISH,
YOU WILL KNOW FOR WHAT TO ASK 155

XV. IN WHICH, FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A LONG TIME, I DO NOT
TALK AT ALL, BUT AM WELL CONTENT TO SIT QUIETLY BY
AND LISTEN TO THE LOVELY NEWS THAT L. H. D., WHO, YOU
WILL REMEMBER, I TOLD YOU ABOUT IN THE PREFACE,
HAS BROUGHT 167