Chapter V: Sandwich-Man

An ill March noon; the flagstones gray with dust; An all-round east wind volleying straws and grit; _ST. MARTIN'S STEPS_, where every venomous gust Lingers to buffet, or sneap, the passing cit; And in the gutter, squelching a rotten boot, Draped in a wrap that, modish ten-year syne, Partners, obscene with sweat and grease and soot, A horrible hat, that once was just as fine; The drunkard's mouth a-wash for something drinkable, The drunkard's eye alert for casual _toppers_, The drunkard's neck stooped to a lot scarce thinkable, A living, crawling blazoning of Hot-Coppers, He trails his mildews towards a Kingdom-Come Compact of _sausage-and-mash_ and _two-o'-rum_!

VI. 'LIZA

_'LIZA'S old man_'s perhaps a little _shady_, _'LIZA'S old woman_'s prone to _booze_ and cringe; But _'LIZA_ deems herself _a perfect lady_, And proves it in her feathers and her fringe. For _'LIZA_ has a _bloke_ her heart to cheer, With _pearlies_ and a _barrer_ and a _jack_, So all the vegetables of the year Are duly represented on her back. Her boots are sacrifices to her hats, Which knock you speechless--_like a load of bricks_! Her summer velvets dazzle _WANSTEAD FLATS_, And cost, at times, a good eighteen-and-six. Withal, outside the gay and giddy whirl, _'LIZA'S_ a stupid, straight, hard-working girl.

VII. 'LADY'

Time, the old humourist, has a trick to-day Of moving landmarks and of levelling down, Till into Town the Suburbs edge their way, And in the Suburbs you may scent the Town. With _MOUNT ST._ thus approaching _MUSWELL HILL_, And _CLAPHAM COMMON_ marching with the _MILE_, You get a _HAMMERSMITH_ that _fills the bill_, A _HAMPSTEAD_ with a serious sense of style. So this fair creature, pictured in _THE ROW_, As one of that 'gay adulterous world,' {79} whose round Is by the _SERPENTINE_, as well would show, And might, I deem, as readily be found On _STREATHAM'S HILL_, or _WIMBLEDON'S_, or where Brixtonian kitchens lard the late-dining air.